Deranged Twitter Direct Messages

It probably won’t surprise you to learn that I occasionally receive some very angry direct messages via Twitter. While some might choose to ignore these, I almost always engage in an effort to bring them to the side of goodness and light - much like an Evangelical Christian might do if they received a direct message from a non-believer. 

Below are some of the more unhinged people I’ve encountered via direct message. Since these aren’t public figures, I’ve cropped out their identifying information: 

Deranged Direct Messenger No. 1: The Guy Who Threated to “Rearrange” My Teeth

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 2: The Person Who Wanted to Know What’s Wrong with Me

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 3:  The Guy Who Thinks I’m An “Absolute Moron”

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 4: The Guy Who Thinks I’m a Piece of Shit  

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 5:  The Guy Who Appears to Have Been Hammered

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 6: The Guy Who Threw a Tantrum and Blocked Me

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 7: The Guy Who Wants Me to “Just Stop It”

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 8: The Person Who Thinks It’s “Unhealthy” To Lose 15 Pounds in 3 Days: 

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 9: I Don’t Even Know Where to Begin:  

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 10: The Guy Who Thinks I’m a Narcissist:

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Deranged Direct Messenger No. 11: The British Guy Who Thinks I’m a Prick

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